The Parts of Ourselves
How embracing the part of myself I once hid helped me feel more at home in who I am:
For years, I didn’t wear shorts.
After losing my leg to childhood cancer, I spent much of my teens trying to make it the least noticeable thing about me. My leg was often the first thing people saw, and I didn’t want to be defined by something I never chose.
So I wore pants. Longer skirts. Anything that might help me blend in and avoid the questions.
At the time, covering my leg felt like a way to protect myself. I wanted the chance to be known before someone decided what my difference meant.
But as the years passed, I began to notice how much space that choice had taken up in my life. I was planning what to wear around other people’s possible reactions. I had started treating a part of myself as something I needed to hide.
Today, I wear shorts. I still notice the occasional stare, and I still have moments of insecurity. The shift is that those moments no longer get to decide what I wear or how much of myself I share.
What I Learned
Looking back, I can see that I wasn’t only hiding my leg. I was carrying the belief that it made me less than.
That belief missed so much of my story. My leg is part of the body that carried me through cancer, childhood, motherhood, and every ordinary day since. It is part of a life I’m proud to call mine, titanium and carbon fiber included.
I can have compassion for the girl who wanted to blend in. She was doing her best to feel safe. And I can let her know that she doesn’t have to hide anymore.
Coaching Takeaway
Many of us learn to edit ourselves in ways that are harder to see. We downplay a strength, keep a need to ourselves, or leave out a piece of our story because we worry how someone will respond.
It can help to ask what that habit has protected us from—and whether we still need it today.
Coming home to yourself may begin with a small choice: wearing the shorts, speaking honestly, or allowing yourself to be seen a little more fully.
Reflection Questions
Is there a part of yourself you’ve learned to hide or downplay?
What were you trying to protect yourself from when you first began doing that?
What do you see in that part of your story now that you couldn’t see then?
What small choice would let you show up more fully as yourself?
Authenticity isn't something you achieve.
It's something you practice, one rooted choice at a time.
Jill Englund Life Coaching
Come Home to Yourself. Build a Life That Feels Like Yours.